Which Path Are You Going to Take?

Making big changes to our lives can be really scary. I think the scariest part about the change isn't the change itself, but rather our fear of failing and what everyone around us will think. It becomes easier to just sit back and remain what we are, with a far off dream of what we want to be and what we want to accomplish just floating softly in the back of our minds. We start thinking of the time it will take to get there, the things we must give up, the people we may lose along the way that have different priorities and goals than us, and the inevitable fear of failure.

I just want to say that I've felt all of those emotions, and have been through all of those obstacles. For me, I have experienced this and more in my decision to become the fittest, healthiest version of myself, and to begin my own business as an online health and wellness coach. I knew it was going to be a big, scary, hairy change and goal. I knew I was going to be judged. I knew I was going to have to give a lot of things up to reach my goals. I knew I was probably going to lose the respect of some people along the way. What I didn't realize, was how trying it would truly be. What I also didn't realize, is that every single person that has knocked me down, made fun of me, told me what I was doing was stupid. told me "I don't care about your progress and Shakeology, why do you have to post it for everyone to see?!" -that those people, the ones who continue to stay negative and just plain mean, are FULL of their own self hatred. The negativity they are portraying onto me, and onto you, is a reflection of THEM, NOT of the wonderful things that YOU are doing and that YOU are trying to accomplish!

It took so long for me to realize that, and so many painful nights of tears and embarrassment. Was what I was doing truly that stupid? Am I really annoying everyone around me? Do people not really care?

But, you know what conclusion I have come to now? That that is ok. I can't please everyone. I can't make everyone see how happy I am and how amazing my journey has been. But I CAN help SOMEONE! I can help the people who care to listen, who are ready to change their lives too, who are happy for those around them and open to positivity and love in their lives. For each person I have lost in my journey to my dreams, I have gained 10 more beautiful ones in my life.

Not everyone is going to care for you. Not everyone is going to have your back. But are we going to let the one mean, hurtful comment overshadow the HUNDREDS and THOUSANDS of beautiful, meaningful, thankful comments we have gotten from the ones who truly matter?

When I first started my weight loss journey with at home fitness programs, I had friends telling me that they knew me, and I'd never finish the program. I'd never drink my shakes every day. It would be cool for a few weeks, and then I'd drop off. I had friends that were mad at me when I said "no" to our lunch dates to Chili's, or our drinking nights to the local bar, or our ice cream dates... not because they were mad at me, but because they had different goals and were mad at themselves in the process. I have learned that as painful as giving those things up, that if those people can't support me and understand my life changes, then that's ok. I had to do what was right for me, and I am the only one I need to ever prove anything to, after all.

And you know what? I finished that program. And have now completed many more. Each program has meant something so incredible to me at that point in my life. Each program I did was what I needed at that time, and has brought me closer to my goals than I have ever imagined. They were more than just "silly fitness programs." They were what have brought me my confidence, happiness, laughter, self worth, and love for fitness again. Maybe that will annoy some people when I want to share my passion with them. Maybe some people will not understand. But that is ok with me now. I appreciate and love the support from each and every single person I have received it from. I LOVE watching people on their own health and fitness journeys, whether it's with me or not! I love watching the training that some are doing at their gym for the next show they're entering, or the way people are training for their next big marathons. It may not be what I'm doing, but I'm so happy and proud for them. I know the hard work and dedication it takes, and I understand the hurt of the naysayers that they must endure.

But what's more beautiful than anything- is their ability to outshine that negativity and prove everyone around them wrong, and prove themselves right. Watching them finish their shows and their marathons- there is nothing like it.

That's part of what I try to do. I share my progress, how I looked and felt before Beachbody programs, in the hopes that I can connect with someone that feels the way I feel, and has felt the way I felt. I want to show them that they can do this- they can make those changes in their lives, and it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. It will be hard, but it can be done, and with the support of our fitness challenge groups- you will have a community that understands and has the same goals as you.

So, what I hope someone can take away from this post, is to live your life, as who you TRULY are, unapologetically. Scream it from the rooftops! Have huge scary dreams that seem INSANE- so embarrassing that you don't even want to tell anyone about them! Then, after that, GO AFTER THEM. Reach those goals. Walk past the haters with your head held high, and don't let ANYONE knock you down. They're not really trying to knock you down, but build themselves up on top of the foundation of their self doubt and hatred. 

We have so little time on this earth. Are we going to spend it shrinking in the shadows, scraping by day by day with the absolute minimum, keeping our hopes and dreams to the side? Or are we going to fearlessly step out into the spotlight, let our passions steer our lives, and NEVER GIVE UP for anything or anyone?

I know which path I'm going for.... and ain't nobody stopping me.

The Power of Loving Oneself

I just began reading Brene Brown's The Gifts of Imperfections, and it has already spoken to me on so many levels (I also HIGHLY recommend it).

In this generation of rising adults, I have felt such a strong pull for the need to always be doing the best, and being the best, and accomplishing faster than EVERYONE around me. It creates a whirlwind of chaos, fear, anxiety, excitement, yet major self-doubt in the process. I feel that those of us who are rising adults, or just spreading our wings into our first career-oriented job, have the sense that we are just NEVER good enough.

We won't be good enough or worthy of praise until we graduate college, or until we are accomplished in our career field, or until we lose the 20 pounds we gained this last year.

I am tired of this way of thinking and feeling. We ARE good enough, right here and right now.

Life doesn't always go the way we originally planned, and that does not make us any less worthy of love and a sense of belonging in this world.

To me, being successful should not only hold true for those who have been fortunate enough to go through the steps of life in what is considered "socially normal" (i.e. graduate high school, go to college, meet the love of your life, graduate college, start your career, get married, have babies, live happily ever after).

Rather, why not let us all see the success in the abundance of COURAGE in those who have suffered from painful life experiences, that have chosen to grow up, take responsibility, and rise above in the end?

To me, it is not about where you start, it is about where you DECIDE which path your life will take with what you are given. Each day, we make THOUSANDS of seemingly small choices, that all end up creating our habits and ultimately our entire fates.

If you take what you are given and try to be and do your best with it, you are SUCCESSFUL and COURAGEOUS in my eyes.

All of these thoughts have reminded me of the story of my upline Star Diamond coach Lindsay Matway's story, who created the entire Bombshell Dynasty (or the umbrella team that I am under as a Beachbody coach). Linsday dropped out of high school at 16, and made most of her money into her mid-20's as a bartender. She never finished school, never stepped foot into college, and would sometimes try starting new business ideas (she calls herself a "serial entrepreneur"). She felt like she was never good enough for anything and would never amount to anyone truly worthy of love.

As if things couldn't get much tougher, she ended up getting pregnant with her boyfriend of a few months. In the last stages of her pregnancy, her daughter had many health complications, causing her to be born prematurely, and racking up about $400,000 of hospital debt.

Lindsay ended up being a 25 year old (partially) single mother and bartender with $400,000 in debt. She filed bankruptcy and her and the father of her child decided something had to give.

That's when she discovered P90X, and was desperate to get back into shape after having her daughter. Well, she ended up getting in incredible shape, and becoming a coach to help others get in shape. She worked HARD for YEARS and she now has not only paid off all of her debt, but is a MILLIONAIRE and was able to pay off her house with CASH last year!

So, you could say the rest is history, but let's look back for a second here.

Lindsay hit a fork in the road and she had two choices: 1) give up and continue to think of herself as unworthy and keep scraping by with her bartender paychecks and tips, because reaching out and trying something else is too risky, or 2) get RID of the blame and self-hate. Love yourself NOW and see yourself as worthy NOW. Stop giving up and start FIGHTING for something no matter what!

Luckily, she chose the latter. And that is what I have chosen and strive to choose every day. That is what I hope YOU will begin to choose!

Take Lindsay's story and just THINK about how powerful loving ourselves can truly be. Not only has she become financially free, but has been able to live her life by her own design, and has become one of the most inspirational leaders in all of Beachbody, and just for anyone looking to change their lives that have never thought themselves capable, and that they are too far gone for that option.

When we finally realize how much we are capable of in the here and now, and that all of the seemingly small choices we are making now will and DO make an impact- that is when we can really let our light out into the world and create MIRACLES.

Love yourself now, because you are worth it. Take risks. Find your passion and WORK for it. Do what you can right now to get where you want to be... those grueling night classes and 9-5 jobs will be worth what you are fighting for! NEVER GIVE UP!